Kids a Prince, cant be the King because Eldrick is still on the thrown. Not sure if its true and I wasn't planning on doing any research to confirm it, so here it is, research is for the nerds. Anyways, Rory McIlroy is proving to the world that he can hang with Tiger in terms of his treatment of the opposite sex. The story goes, no idea how it actually goes, but hear is what I hope happened. McIlroy goes home after a long day on the course and a few Guinness's to his lady, Caroline Wozniacki, women's professional grunter or some call tennis player. Small conversation ensues, she probably pours him a drink and takes off his shoes. He proceeds to pull out his little leprechaun and bends her over the pot of gold and show her the 4 nations of the United Kingdom. (He is from Northern Ireland, yes a part of the UK, don't test me) I mean he puts in the man hours, pulls out all the stops, the fade, the draw, back spin, you name it, Rory lays it down. He finishes the back nine and tells Wozo to make him a sandwich and goes to sleep. This Women thinks its cute to take his picture and throw it up on the old twit machine so everyone can see what he looks like asleep. Stupid, who wants to see that shit? Yet, kinda harmless, unless your Big McIlroy. He seizes this opportunity to show the world he doesnt mess around with tennis bitches, he can get what ever he wants and will break you before you can tweet another word. Wozo has a choke collar and the shortest leash they sell, and he puts her in the dog house. Break up at its finest. He still is no Tiger though, give him a few years and he will realize how to keep a wife and 18 sloots in his back pocket.
PS - As of like 4 hours ago, I think they are back together or something. Sounds like my high school relationship, grow up Rory I was really pulling for you here.
By TheBenchKeeper
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